I’ve taken a short little break this month. August is traditionally busy with back to school preparations and loads of birthdays in my daughter’s friend circle, so I wasn’t unprepared for how occupied I would be. What did take me by surprise was how much I didn’t want to sew. How the thought of cutting fabric and sewing it up didn’t excite me one bit. How I dreaded even going into my sewing studio. Shocked? I think I have been going so hard at testing that I’m completely burnt out. I now see tester calls and think, “Meh.” Which is so dangerous for me! What will I ever do without testing new patterns? How will I motivate myself? Sewing has been #3 in my life, after my husband and kids – how can I possibly sew less?

The big thing I’m working on while on this little break is decluttering my life. I have accumulated so much junk, so much stuff that is weighing on my soul. Books that have no purpose other than to look Pinterest-pretty, since I’ve read them all and reading murders heightens my anxiety. Kids’ clothes, my husband’s old clothes, so much of my crafting stuff and fabric. Everywhere I look there’s stuff, and it’s dragging me down. Each time I see a fabric on sale, I *have* to go shopping. It’s very rare that I close the browser before I checkout.

While I worked through this morass of belongings, I came to a little realization. All the clothes I have sewn are brightly colored, the fabric picked to be “stylish”, perfect to sell the pattern, perfect to spam in various fabric groups. It’s all mostly polyester, mostly tired and jarring because it’s what sells a pattern. I don’t sew solids, I don’t sew obscure indie designers, and I don’t sew what I need to sew. I sew the latest pattern in the latest fabric in the latest colors regardless of whether I need another floral trapeze top or not. And with polyester, it’s usually not, because that stuff is indestructible.

I pared down most of my clothes, and really felt sorry for the state of my pants pile. Everything is either dowdy, pilling, worn out at the inner thigh or too freaking tight on the abdomen. Looks like I’m not a size 12 anymore – pregnancy and lavish eating (while dairy and soy free, too!) put paid to *that* notion! The only comfortable items I have are cotton joggers, my (polyester ponte) Sabrina Slims in green and grey which were my tester muslin and final, and a maxi skirt which is definitely not Fall-worthy. So what did I do? I planned to make a few leggings in my Fall/Winter Capsule. Yes, they will be polyester. Yes, they will be floral, at least a few. Yes, I do like my Granny’s style. Ha!

I proceeded to pull out all the Fall colors I want to wear from my fabric stash. Stacked them high on a chair, and then promised to sell what I didn’t want. You know, if they lie around, visible to the eye, you’re going to want to pull them out of the Sell pile and put them back into the Maybe pile. And then Maybe never comes. In being such a voracious sewist, I find I have exchanged the fast-fashion consumerism that plagued me through my teens for the faster satisfaction of buying fabric for the sake of it. It looks different so I must have it. In three colors.

In the next post, I’m going to talk a little about my Fall Capsuling process. I’m not a purist, I don’t like to sew *everything*. I draw the line at jeans and jackets. I am hoping that by documenting my Capsuling journey that I will stop myself from frivolously buying more. It already worked yesterday when I saw a divine tunic that looked like silk but was 95% polyester, and I just quietly closed the browser without a qualm. Trust me, it can help you too.

I’m now going to move towards putting what little time I have into understanding the design process, slowly sewing it *right*, instead of buzzing through my piles of fabric and three tests a week. Perhaps I truly am burned out.